It seems that all I've ever done is start over! Right now it's been with my computer, and now my book….
I feel that you struggle to create what you desire, to accomplish a goal, but as soon as you get near, or you have it in reach…. "poof" it's gone and you have to start over. It's like a soap bubble floating in the breeze. You may be able to grasp and hold it.. but you can't really do anything with it because if you move the wrong way… "poof" it's gone.
Why is this an issue for me?
What am I not seeing or feeling?
Where is all this coming from?
How did I get this imprint, program or belief?
I feel it is an imprint, something that I've carried with me for all of my existence. Trying to create what I desire only to always have it dashed, cut down, stopped, taken away or destroyed.. I want to heal this… As I'm typing this for this post I can feel utter heartbreak… Lost hopes, dreams and desires… and the never ending story of love and life lost… not even lost… never known is more like it…