People talk of being balanced but in actuality what they’re really talking about is about being “in” control and not being triggered into their denied issues. When we’ve healed our issues, we are “in” balance as what used to activate us no longer does.. We are no longer running form one end of the denial teeter-totter to the other end “looking” for balance in our life.. We are living it…
The problem created by people looking for balance in their lives is that they ignorantly expect the "other" person to move or behave in a certain way (known only to them) that will give them a feeling of balance and being "in" control. Being "in" control is not the same as being "in" balance. If the other person moves in the wrong direction or in the wrong way (which they always do unless they are in denial) the person locking for balance claims that the other person is either attacking them or not co-operating or whatever form of blame that surfaces as a result of their denied issues and imprints of their lack of control that is being activated.
The blindness, ignorance and irony in all this is that the person that is looking to be in balance fails to see that the only person on the teeter-totter that is rocking their boat, so to speak, is themselves. Each is oblivious to the fact that they are on separate teeter-totters and are not even touching one another, yet each is demanding that the other move in such a way that will allow the other to feel that they have control and balance of the teeter-totter which they think they share. If it wasn’t so pathetic, it would be funny.
Of course if they don't like the end of the teeter-totter that they are on, they can always run to the opposite end, and be firmly rooted in their new point of view, that now, because they are doing and experiencing the opposite of what they were, they have found balance. On one end of the denial teeter-totter they blamed other people, places and things, and on the opposite end, they blame themselves and everything in them. Where there is blame and judgment there are control issues and no balance. Balance is when there is no blame and no denials because there are no issues triggering you.
To be "in" balance, we need to first be in balance with our inner being, our right side (Spirit and Mind) male with our left side (Will and feelings) female. Unless we find our inner balance we can't possibly hope to find balance in the outer world, and to find this inner balance, we need to give up being in control.