’09 April 04 In my past lives, and in this one, I’ve been a warrior in one way or another, fighting to protect the weak, the innocent or the oppressed. The irony is that I was fighting (using force) to change the aggressors, to make them non-aggressive. I was fighting for a cause, to bring understanding, peace, freedom and love into the world, but it was a never ending battle with no way of ever winning because it’s all about being in CONTROL and while the intent may appear to be loving, it is a bent intent as underneath it all is unloving denial, control and manipulation of self and of others to create the illusion of peace and freedom.
Now, (in this present time) everyone is going to have to fight their own inner and outer battles and make their own choices as to whether or not they choose to end their denials and inner conflict that will also end their outer conflicts that they are experiencing. It may sound cruel, but it’s not loving to “save” another who doesn’t choose to save themselves. And I don’t mean in the outer experiences, I mean on an inner level where they knowingly choose to be in denial of the other parts of their being and their experiences. I’m wrestling with this one as I feel that the only time that you can reach out and physically help another is when they are a part of your “now” experiences. It can be that they ask you for help, or you feel drawn to help, but even then, it’s like all that you can really do is to throw them a rope, and it is up to them to choose to grab it and pull themselves to safety. If they don’t have the desire ort intent to help themselves, then there is nothing that you can and should do.
It’s like my books, I can write the books and get the message out there, but people not only need to be searching and have the intent to read them, but they also need the desire and intent to put what they read into practice to see if what I say works for me, also works for them. I can’t make then read and I can’t make them change their intent or their Hearts. Whether they are the villains or victims, the power to change themselves is in their hands and if they don’t want to change, then there is nothing that I or anyone can do to change them.
Of course change is possible if you go back to the “old” ways which gives the appearance of change by over-powering and controlling others to have them do what you want them to do, or by extending help to “save” others by sacrificing yourself to allow others to have freedom. Over-powering and saving are the two ends of the denial teeter-totter that have been controlling our experiences throughout all our history. The battle that I’ve been fighting has been in trying to bring balance between these two opposing elements, but only now, in this life time, do I realize that it is impossible as both elements are based in denial and unlovingness.
For things to change, you need to get off the denial based teeter-totter reality as then the base for reality becomes one of no denials, but truth and unconditional love. Everyone that wants to change is going to have to make the choice of which path they are going to take. The old familiar, well traveled wide path of denial, or the new path of ending denials. If the reality they are experiencing is not the one they desire, then only their intent and heartfelt desire will get them out of the present old world reality and into the new world.
It’s no longer my fight, duty or responsibility to try to pull or push them out of their old world denial based reality, but instead, to allow them to know they have a choice a choice that needs to not only heartfelt intent and desire, but also action that will allow them to move. Having the choice to end denials and this inner and outer battle is something that everyone is going to go through. The inner battle is the real battle ground as that is where the conflict begins and where it needs to end. A symbol of our coming into our true power and ending this inner battle, is not only willingly laying down our sword, but also our shield, and to be open and vulnerable, secure in the power of love, self love.