2011 Jan 01, In recent dealings with my own situation and in chats with other people, I’m becoming increasingly aware of how the power of denial works in what some might consider a constructive and positive way, or attitude, in that whatever happens to them that they don’t like, they simply ignore and pretend it never happened. It’s like they wash it from their brain (Mind) and carry on as if nothing happened, but that only applies to things that they can’t control. I can’t really tell what is actually going on in their Mind, but from all outward appearances and feelings, it’s like the delete button was pressed and all memory is erased. It still may be in the “recycle” bin but as far as affecting their everyday activity, it’s no longer an issue.
So I’ve been thinking, how does one deal with a person that is in denial of being in denial. It’s like talking to a brick wall as they don’t recognize, let alone accept their denials, yet when originally activated by your expression, they expect you to be the one to apologize on having called them on their bullshit and denials. They make it out as if you’re the bad one, the one that is wrong and in denial.
They use all kinds of tricks to try to get you to reverse yourself and accept their denials. They put on the “nice” religious persona of pretending they are open to help you and are willing to turn the other cheek, to forgive and forget that anything happened, or they try to smother you with what they call love, but which is actually guilt and shame. It’s like they are trying to catch a mouse with a trap baited with cheese, but when the mouse doesn’t bite the bait (the cheese) they ask what is wrong with the mouse, are you crazy, you love cheese.
Under the facade, the illusion of niceness and politeness, you can feel their denials and the denied rage that is smoldering, as if waiting for a chance to pounce once again, when it feels that you are vulnerable and open to attack, so that it can overpower you and be in control once again. I don’t know where all this is going but I feel that there is a lot more to this.