On Sunday July 03, my sister invited me to join her, her son and my mother in their monthly Chinese food luncheon. I decided to go and during the meal and my mother mentioned something about children and fathers and I remembered the times when my mother and father would say that each of us children had a different fathers, that my father was such and such, and that my sisters father was so and so, and so on down the line. My mother denied that she or dad ever said that and that I was bad for making up such stories.
After the meal, I opened my fortune cookie with the message that said, “You may lose the small ones but you will win the big ones.” As we left the table, my sister came up to me and whispered my fortune cookie quote to me.
As a child, those comments were not only confusing but heartbreaking in that I felt I wasn’t wanted or loved, either by my father and mother, or the father they said I had. It was also terrifying as they threatened to send us back to our respective fathers if we didn’t behave. If that threat didn’t work, then we were threatened to be sent to reform school, or that they would just give us to the Indians if we didn’t behave ourselves.
Later that day my other sister called and I asked her if she remembered those experiences. She not only remembered, but she also remembered the name of the person that they said was her father. She couldn’t remember mine, but the name Exner keeps coming to my mind.
NOTE: I have written three books on my healing journey and you can download free PDF copies from my website at the following link… Shenreed.com .
Saysame (Says-a-me) 